Saturday, 8 March 2014

Friends aftermath...maybe a slap in the face?

As I wrote earlier that the friend circle here in London is a changing scene...I was very happy that after the 4 hour phone call with 'my then bestfriend' we finally were to even meet up!

Guess what...

The first half an hour went very fast! We were both extremely excited! :) Had a nice cake and a hot drink but at one point...his old self came out and then he was just talking and talking...not letting me to say even one word...

Then I am sure my face seemed still excited because he then changed to a topic...he found God and as he is studying now to become a teacher he decided to give me a lesson about religion. I thought this evening would be full of with light conversation and not about such deep topics. He talked about it passionately, but again...we were back at square one - I could not say a word and he thought I did not know all those he just told me.

Multiple religious signs in praying people's mind
Religions from here.
Later when we actually were about to leave, the atmosphere was ok, but the tension was already there...which then burst out of him in the middle of Topshop when I said something to him...

Stone me! Or just write me your opinion for this.... 
I told him I felt I am now a woman and not only a girl and - obviously besides Udo, Mark or Mr Novartis, - I would only start a relationship with someone who is on the same level as I am in terms of education well not exactly education, I'd rather say being as smart or smarter as I am. I also told him that what I meant I would need someone I could be able to talk intellectually; about life, art, our place in the world, finding ourselves, our personality, work and about all little impressions that I had throughout my day and of course vice versa.

He then vehemently and loudly elaborated how much I changed in the past 8 years. And if he was thinking in the same way, then he should have never talked to me, when we first met, as I had worked in one of the fast food restaurants in London. He told me he would have loved to capture the moment when we met and stay like that for the rest of our life! Because the more successful I became the more despising I was towards him because he was unemployed in the past 2-3 years (pursuant to his theory). Furthermore he also said that it probably was best that we did not talk in the past 6 months and it was because I was changing.

But we all are changing, aren't we? 

This is the normal way of life and personal development we go through until the very end of our life! We learn through our mistakes, through friendships, relationships, travels, education and through every little experience we live through!

Those people who stuck in the past and either want to carry on their life in the past or limit their personal development would eventually become depressed.

I don't want this! I need all those beautiful little things in life which made me who I am today! I respect my past and could not say that I would not change anything, but I learnt how to get back to the right track even from the most convoluted way :)

Life is beautiful from here.
 So first I felt this was just like a slap in the face and I must have become a terrible person...but then discussing this with my other friends, some of them, our common friends...told me he was projecting his own insecurities on me. I think this is too harsh, but at least I don't feel bad anymore!

Lastly a great quote, I think fits in this post perfectly from Marcus Aurelius!

The Happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts - Quote by Marcus Aurelius
Marcus Aurelius Quote from here.

'Perfect start' for my birthday!
I'll update you tomorrow how my 30th Birthday...well rather birthweek or even birthmonth was/is going on :)

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